(no subject)

[xiphias.livejournal.com]

So, I was talking to my mother about Arisia, and how Arisia has amazing volunteer staff who work themselves to a frazzle, and how, because of this, Arisia ALSO tries to have things around to make staffers NOT die, like hot food and stuff like that, but that one problem was getting staffers to actually USE those things, since they're working themselves to the bone and won't take half an hour to sit down and have a hot meal.

Clearly, my mother feels, what is needed is someone in charge of kidnapping other staffers and making them have a hot meal.

So she asked whether it would be okay if she had a ninja mask.

"What?"

"Well, I'm a mother. And clearly, what is needed is a mother for other staffers. A NINJA MOMMY! Who will KIDNAP DIV HEADS AND FEED THEM!!"

Um.

So, I guess my question is, if my mother volunteers for Arisia next year in Staff Den-type capacities, can she have a ninja mask? I already told her that Security will probably NOT let her have throwing stars.

Comments

[kgola.livejournal.com]

that's actually an awesome idea... as someone who didn't make it up to the staff den often enough (I work Ops desk, and was pretty much on a short leash all of friday, most of saturday late night, and part of sunday morning, and the elevator took too long, and the stairs were numerous), I would recommend the ninja mommy to make deliveries as well as trying to kidnap people. :)

[jasra]

We had food delivered to Reg a couple of times, but a Ninja Mommy would be a fabulous idea, for food delivery and kidnapping.

[xiphias.livejournal.com]

For the record: Massage Den does house-calls. Phone up, make an appointment, and if you can't make it to us, we'll come to you to do a chair-massage. Obviously, we'd RATHER you have a come to us where you can lie down for a massage -- when possible, staff members really DESERVE to have an hour-long massage on a massage table with soothing music and so forth -- but, if someone is available, we'll come to you, too.

[zeyr.livejournal.com]

I managed to hit the staff den a grand sum total of ONCE. And I think I snacked on some of the stuff they sent down to Security/Ops. The 'fast food table' the hotel ran in the lobby was convenient...as was Con Suite. mmmm...bagels and lox!

Kelyn

[jasra]

I think that's a great idea!

[summerrose.livejournal.com]

Now that's a really *nice* use of the ninja concept!

[mishmosh.livejournal.com]

Amen!

[queenmabwords.livejournal.com]

What about throwing stars made of a hot meal? Pancake throwing stars?

[xiphias.livejournal.com]

I think that would have to be taken up with Ops.

I think that if Ops was bribed with Chinese Throwing Croissants, maybe?

[lensman.livejournal.com]

"I already told her that Security will probably NOT let her have throwing stars."

Well maybe if they were "Throwing Star shaped Cookies"...

[chaiya.livejournal.com]

I would totally make some of those for this purpose ... ;)

[zeyr.livejournal.com]

I would absolutely tell my people to let those slide. :) And they could get topped with icing and those silver ball jimmies to look 'realistic'.

Kelyn

[tisiphone.livejournal.com]

As long as she doesn't run up to unwilling people who were teased as children for being too skinny, fail to magically divine that fact, and throw cookies at them?

[buxom-bey.livejournal.com]

*snerk*

[ayalanya.livejournal.com]

hah! that would be great.

(actually, might she take on helpers? i could be a delivery-ninja.)

[xiphias.livejournal.com]

She would have to have helpers.

I think that, for this to be practical, Mom (aka rebmommy) would have to be part of chaiya's staff, or whomever is going to be Staff Denmother next year. If this was actually made into a position, and Mom ended up with it, you'd need people working with her who could physically take a hot meal or two up and down many flights of stairs, regularly. My mother is working on getting better, but she DOES walk with a cane -- if this gives her an incentive to be healthy enough to go up and down fourteen flights of stairs repeatedly, that's good, but if there ARE delivery ninjas, they will HAVE to be able to use the stairs.

[whouseknecht.livejournal.com]

Ninja mask, hm? As long as she sticks to handing out cookies instead of soap (http://community.livejournal.com/arisia/137560.html), she should be fine... ;)

[madfilkentist]

Can we have a duel between the Mommy Ninja and the Hygiene Ninja?

[roozle.livejournal.com]

I *already* knew your mom was amazing...

Assistant Div Heads...

[(Anonymous)]

How about this:

Each div head gets an assistant div head.

Each assistant div head is issued one blowgun and six tranqulizer darts.

The assistant div head's highest priority job is to make sure anyone who
needs a little nap - TAKES a little nap.

This expecially includes their specific div head.

- Crash

[unquietsoul5.livejournal.com]

But can she repell? That would be the solution for the ninjas and the problem with the elevators....

[xiphias.livejournal.com]

She's got a year -- she can learn, right?

[zarhooie.livejournal.com]

If she can be a ninja, I want to be a pirate! Pirates are good at kidnapping people, and the last two years, I've run "food missions" for coat check, ops and reg.

[xiphias.livejournal.com]

I think that Arisia should definitely use Pirates, Ninjas, Robots AND Monkeys to help support staff and make sure that they are fed, hydrated, napped, and otherwise taken care of. It's important to approach problems from multiple angles, and if you have pirates, ninjas, robots, and monkeys working on a problem, how can you fail?

("Ahh, alcohol and sex. Is there any problem they can't solve?" "Yes." "Oh, okay then. Well, is there any problem that they can't CAUSE?")

[voltbang.livejournal.com]

Apparantly, the mental health of Arisia guests is too fragile to handle the concept of anyone in a ninja mask with unsolicited advice. You may want to send bodyguards with your mother on her missions, as they have managed to intimidate the original ninja.

[xiphias.livejournal.com]

Um.

You've not met my mother. She's a MOTHER -- she is quite capable to telling people if they ought to go take a shower.

[volta]

Make it happen. I will happily volunteer a few hours to do ninja food delivery if it does.

[bridgetminerva.livejournal.com]

When I worked in staff den I used to keep a mental list of peole I'd seen and go hunt them down if I didn't see them 2 times a day. This often led to conversations like " I had a date, who are you my mom." No just the person who knows you aren't taking care of yourself right. where is your sweater?"

When someone is new to a posotion it is hard to cover all the bases.

[crazybone.livejournal.com]

Hygiene Ninja. Ninja Mommies.
Apparently the theme for Arisia 2008 is:
"Night of a Million, Billion Ninjas."
I wonder if Arthur and the Tick are available as well.

"Let's hang ten for justice!" - The Tick